The Black Hole

I'm not sure any of this will make sense. I have three blogs: Wordpress, here and Live Journal. I recently stopped posting to Live Journal because although it was more the community aspect and personal side of life I found it wasn't communication. Many people post/read to keep track of each other but how much can you read about one person's theses, knitting, angst, writing, etc. every day?

At least it does let you know what someone you know is doing and you can check in from time to time. But for communication, it didn't work very well. Few people would ever respond to my posts, not that responses were required most times, as I didn't respond to everyone else's.

But when I asked a question, even a serious question, I would only get a few comments and fewer rarely answering the question. Of the thirty or so people supposedly reading my journal, I believe at least 5-10 read periodically or not at all. The others are fairly steady. I'd sometimes post questions to their posts and would likewise receive no response when I asked a question.

When I decided I was wasting my time and would go back to writing in a paper journal and I posted this to the site; no one commented. Which told me everyone is too busy, or no one cared or no one read. Good reasons to stop. Two people wanted to know where my other blogs were and that was it. So communication, no. One way info blurbs, sure.

I have enough to do anyways and three blogs is a bit too much for me. I repeat myself, like a creaky wheel. Most of us aren't that witty in the day to day and then it becomes boring.

But then perhaps I'm in a vortex. I've sent emails to people and received no answer. I've called people and received no answer. Not everyone, mind you, but many things and many time sensitive questions. Enough that I've begun to wonder if my communications are broken. It's a very odd feeling, feeling like one is in a black hole.

As a pagan, I put out calls (so to speak) to the gods (a general concept with more explanation needed) and there is no answer there. Soon I'll pull the plug there too. One last week to get some sort of positive (as opposed to negative--I have enough of that) response or I'll walk away. I'm not a catnip toy after all; to be toyed with when it amuses one and forgotten the rest of the time.