Vanity Searches

I spent a couple of hours this week searching myself out. Why? To fluff up my ego? Hardly likely. A vanity search will often reveal how insignificant we are in terms of the Google world. At least I'm on the first google page but not so much for my published stories as for this blog.

But still, I thought I better find what's listed about me before it all disappears. Should there come a day for me to prove I published something or to apply for a grant, then in some cases this may be the only published proof, such as my online flash fiction "On Wings of Angels" in Vestal Review 7. I found that still up and printed the page since I didn't have a "published" copy, it being only internet published.

It's also, partially, how I found out I had received two honorable mentions for my story "Hold Back the Night," which had appeared in the Red Deer Press Open Space anthology. I'd known I had received an honorable mention in Gardner Dozois' Year's Best SF, but only a few years later did I find out the story had received the same in Datlow and Windling's Year's Best Fantasy and Horror. One story, both SF and Fantasy when there was no SF I know of in it. :) But who's complaining: not me. Still, the vanity search has shown what few reviews of my work are still out there and though none scream that my work is stellar, most don't say it sucks either. And I do have the distinction of Hold Back the Night being the only story in the anthology to receive two honorable mentions, plus having been shortlisted for the Gaylactic Spectrum award (a gay character in speculative fiction), which I only ever found on the net.

But still, I'm a small pea in a large pod and there are a lot of Colleen Andersons, some 80 google pages in fact. There is a songwriter and poet (Mother Wit) who seems to have the most hits, plus another writer with the same name. There's a minister, a scientist, a professor, a real estate agent, a tax assessor, a nurse, etc. Of course I'm some of these things too. But I'm certainly not the only Colleen Anderson and perhaps I'm not the real one. I've run into a couple others in this city alone.

Still, a vanity search can be enlightening in just how many of your posts or even how your address ends up on the internet. I can't help but think of my childhood nemesis Laura Morse who lived two doors down from me. We met at the age of 4 and never liked each other, and had the dubious pleasure of spending grades 1-12 together, going to the same schools. Her younger brother and mine were the best of friends. We were barely playmates. She used to say she would only read books that had her name in them.

Searching for Laura Morse today doesn't turn up her name but then she married and changed her last name. Yet, google might still be useful to her if she has to find books with Laura in them (more by authors though, than characters). One can only hope her horizons have broadened.

And we, that fill one page in 8o, hope that some day there may be many pages, indicating perhaps a rise in pay for being a writer. Of course, one could always do something notorious and then your name would rise on the google listings. In the meantime, I now have printed copies of any reviews, should I decide to try and get a grant for writing speculative fiction. Hmm, I think I'll wait a bit longer.